Thursday, March 3, 2011

WOW!!!! ADVERTISING!

Hey! I'll be starring in a post dinner theater version of "A night at the L&L tavern on Belmont and Clark" this saturday night. I'll be playing the role of creepy bartender with a beard. You should come down and get drunk. It's the part I was born to play. I'll be serving tigers blood and chocolate milk and everything else that could possibly relate to the insane popularity of Charlie Sheen's meltdown...um...yeah. Come see me. It's the least you can do. er...um, winning? is that it? Rhymes with winning?

46 comments:

Jayzilla said...

#TIGERBLOOD

Drew Brooks said...

Sinning. Sinning rhymes with winning.

Robb said...

What a LoOnY, that Mickey Roooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

Sean said...

anyone wanna start a band?

Sean said...

no, that wouldn't work, would it.

bill_stickers said...

Please serve a cocktail called a "Droopy Eyed Armless Child"

Felix said...

Brendan, did you hear about this?

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1362646/Northwest-University-investigate-sex-toy-demonstration-Faith-Kroll.html?ITO=1490

It's A-Me, Martucci said...

Best of luck with the band Sean, as long as you don't name it Tiger Blood or any current pop culture reference for that matter. I consider it a minor miracle that there's not a band called Cyber Police out there (to my knowledge)

It's A-Me, Martucci said...

"My thoughts and prayers are with Charlie Sheen tonight, as he's been diagnosed with Full Blown Busey"

fuck Sarah Silverman

It's A-Me, Martucci said...

Fucking inept comparison, ya know? Isnt Sheen more of a less-charismatic Robert Evans, on crack? In terms of presence and opinion of himself? Couldnt you envision him narrating his autobiography audiobook in the same way?

It's A-Me, Martucci said...

prob some less-charismatic Robert Downey Jr on crack in there too

It's A-Me, Martucci said...

Takin some cues from Sean here. The "waaaaall o' comments"! Hopefully it'll really irritate Kevin or somethin

It's A-Me, Martucci said...

"Josh Brolin & Javier Bardem both look like they're wearing prosthetic faces over their faces"

nevermind, Silverman can be ok sometimes

It's A-Me, Martucci said...

Know how sometimes ya can just look at someone and know they've got real fat, rounded, bulbous toes? <-- That's another freebie
Listen Bren anytime ya need a twitter ghostwriter just holla

It's A-Me, Martucci said...

Know how sometimes ya can just look at someone and know that person doesn't give a fuck about blu-ray?

It's A-Me, Martucci said...
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It's A-Me, Martucci said...

I dunno, I think bulbous toes was prob my fav of that bunch, it's the most universal

It's A-Me, Martucci said...

Ever look at someone and just know they secretly love the climactic street fight in Rocky V? nevermind that's prob the best

It's A-Me, Martucci said...

"Cmon knock that bum out he took my ROOOOOOM!!"

It's A-Me, Martucci said...

"Can you imagine the size of the model train sets Christopher Nolan and his brother must have assembled as children? Fucking obnoxious"

--Patton Oswalt

siiiike that shit's all me

It's A-Me, Martucci said...

"Fuck, Martucci, I wanna punch you in the dick"

Fuck, I want to punch every person on here in the dick, repeatedly, except for like seven people

BEEXtrix Potter said...

Can I try one?
"Every time someone gets excited about that stupid fucking upcoming Atlas Shrugged movie, lil' baby jesus continues to have never existed"

Yea, I see the appeal in this

BEEXtrix Potter said...

"Ever been in line at the supermarket and seen someone in front of you buying that weird Mexican fruit soda? Yea me neither"

BEEXtrix Potter said...

Combo: "I bet that creepy-ass Mexican fruit soda no one buys tastes like baby jesus jizzing in your mouth, if he'd ever been around to do that i mean"

BEEXtrix Potter said...
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BEEXtrix Potter said...

"Display these comments on some kind of half-ass projector setup with really shit resolution at the L&L or whatever tomorrow"

BEEXtrix Potter said...
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BEEXtrix Potter said...

"Boy it'd be real fun to gently interrupt someone talking about their fascination with Nazi/Third Reich aesthetics at some swanky soiree and politely ask them if they're "fucking retarded"

BEEXtrix Potter said...

"Is there a direct correlation with the surname 'Rappaport' and chronic socially-debilitating halitosis? Almost certainly, but who gives a shit"

BEEXtrix Potter said...

"Is it a coincidence that Evian is naive backwards? Of course it is, you fucking idiot"

BEEXtrix Potter said...

"Is there a direct correlation between being a caucasian male named Jamie and being a pale-skinned wigger piece of shit? Absolutely not, are you fucking crazy?"

Caleb said...

You're sort of a niche actor eh? Isn't that how you always are?

Sean said...

hahaha, see, the "wall" is fun, isn't it?

Sean said...

... also, love the James reference. Who is that guy, even?

And what exactly gave his fist a thirst for dick?

Sean said...

how's that for a band name: Thirst For Dick.

"You gunna catch TFD when they cum through Chicago? I hear they've got this gimmick where they rig a dildo onto a hacksaw (read: "fucksaw")and bring this mildly attractive redhead to show the audience 'her ohhhh face!' Gon' be tits!"

Sean said...

{.... wish I could go to the L&L, but I'm stuck in this hell hole they've deemed "Champaign-Urbana" for the most obnoxious, douchefest of the year.... "Unofficial." Riding my bike to class some dick fratboy pretended to "jump" in front of my bike to try to scare me. So obviously I swerved in HIS direction. He ended up stumbling back into some "chick" that I can only assume he started pathetically hitting on.}

jbody said...

Man come on dawg..ghostin tweets for beeeeex would be like playing bass and helping with arrangements on russel crowes bands next joint.dont fucking encourage that activity .naaaaaah

jbody said...

And is body gon have to be the one to point out the obvious.......sheens been ghostin sooome bree tweets ypu fucking idiots!

jbody said...

oh yeeeah beeextrix,but tha weird shit is why them jamey wigger boyz always got that enviably delicate ass bone structure and piercing blue eyes?buncha bang bros/sans condoz.t=yaaaaaaaaaah

Drunken Acorn said...

Sean I will support your band if you name it Thirst for Dick.

Shayla said...
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Shayla said...

If you wanna come across the street to starbucks i'll give you some coffee.

Sean said...

how bout i just name my first child that instead?

Jamie said...

I'm bi-....winning

jbody said...
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Sean said...

hey guys...

just curious, is there like a website where i can post a song and i can get some feedback on it?

I know there's always youtube.... but I hear the quality is decreased if you upload it onto there...

that and it doesn't seem like "youtube feedback" would be that helpful haha