Thursday, October 2, 2008

Tramps like us, Billy, we were born to run!

Yeah, the Cubs lost. It’s a drag. Now I have to go to work. I kind of had a panic attack this morning…it was real strange. I always feel like I can handle whatever gets thrown at me and this morning I was kind of paralyzed because there were dirty dishes and I have to get a few days off of work…What the fuck is that about? It’s passed now, but I was sweating and kind of losing it. Just writing this is making me nervous. I gotta quit sniffing glue.
Okay, it’s come to my attention that there are lots and lots of things out there that are nowhere near as great as people say they are. This will be a small sampling of said items. As always, this is fact based, and therefore your differing opinions are wrong. AND just to be clear, some of these things are pretty good, just not the fucking end all-be all that they’re made out to be.
Okay.
Ronald Reagan’s political legacy- Seriously? Does no one remember the 80’s? This guy was charismatic and it was fun to listen to his hard assed rasp give a speech, but he was a pretty shitty president. That’s the last time we had bank failures and massive unemployment, for fucks sake! Nowdays, republicans from McCain to Sean Hannity talk about Reagan in hushed tones. I guess it’s because there’s no one else on the roster. It’s kind of like I say to my baby. He’s my favorite son, but based on his competition, he’s also my least favorite son…it’s just how it goes.

Bruce Springsteen- This guy, okay, he’s fine. I think it’s funny that a tiny jew with an afro and penchant for black guy music has kind of recapitulated himself as the all American boy and no one even blinked. See? That’s funny. He’s like Reagan though. Everyone these days just worships at the Springsteen altar like he’s the rockinist dude of all time. Well, here’s a news flash: Just because he played a telecaster it doesn’t forgive the fact that he was pretty cheesy and only marginally and occasionally ballsy. Now, if you’re from Jersey, I get it. He’s your boy, and that’s cool. He’s like Jon Bon Jovi’s predecessor and everything. But otherwise. Come on. Seriously, pound for pound, Springsteen is about as bad ass as Billy Joel. (Hey, shutuppayouface!)

Burritos- They’re fucking huge! Who needs all that? The veggie ones you can cut in half and put in the fridge, but if you do that with Al Pastor or carnitas, it gets inedible pretty quick. I eat burritos pretty regularly. I just don’t believe how much they dominate the consciousness of what Mexican food should be. Have a torta every now and then.

The Dark Knight- It was okay. Heath Ledger was good. The rest of the movie, not so much. Do an experiment. Think of the movie without Heath Ledger, or without the joker in general. There’s still a hero and a villain, there’s still romance and a fall from grace and a story arc. It’s just not that good. I know, he’s in there, so what does it matter? Well, I tend to think the uh…BIGGEST MOVIE OF ALL TIME or whatever, probably up for Oscars, should have more than one compelling character.

New York- Great town. The chick from the Flavor of Love series though? Fuck man…she’s got dudes lining up to catch her gross pussy diseases and get yelled at by her crypt-keeper-in-blackface-and-drag mom. For 3 seasons? That’s lots of dudes! I don’t get it. I guess I’m old. Kids these days.
MC Ren- He was in a great group, but don’t give me this MC Ren is the best MC in NWA shit. Ice Cube was amazing back then and Ren was just trying to keep up. He did a decent job, but once Cube left and Ren had to write all Easy’s Rhymes, he fell off. There’s no Dopeman verse on Efil4zaggiN, nothing close. Well, Automobile is pretty great. That’s a whole different kind of thing, but it’s rad. Here’s a fun thing to do: Go download “Automobile” by NWA and play it for your mom. It’ll be a hoot.

That’s all for now. I know, pretty short, incomplete and totally wrong list. Well, I have to work. Commence telling me about how badass bruce springsteen and billy joel are. Drunk driving is not cool, though, and will not be accepted as proof of bad assness, so yeah. Chew on that.
Bye.

21 comments:

nchipman said...

Springsteen Jewish? You're kidding right? Even though the last name sounds Jewish I'm pretty sure he's half Irish and half Italian.

bloodiedup3o said...

I had to create an account on this damn thing just so I can leave a comment...
I saw the Dark Knight twice, not because of Ledger or I thought the movie was amazing or anything like that, but because of Skiba's half-a-millisecond appearance. I just had to be sure it was him. Definitely worth it.

KyleLM said...

I agree about the burritos. You need to have a stuffed sopapilla with green chili man.

Sam Tie Blogger said...

The Dark Knight was awesome! Not just because of Heath Ledger, everyone was great in the movie! Even the dude thats in the Wendy's commercials now was sweet.

Burritos are the greatest thing to ever happen to food. Brendan, stop being wrong!

Also, you forgot High Life!

I still love reading the blog though!

I use to many !s...

T.NERB said...

when i was about 8, my mom heard me play "automobile". needless to say, shit did not go well.

SauliosBj123 said...

The Dark Knight was a perfectly fine movie, but I have no interest in ever seeing it again (or even very much interest in even staying through the whole thing, but I guess its too late for that now.) The last movie that was hyped anywhere near that much was Borat and that was the only movie that lived up to its hype ever.

John Brown Style said...

Yeah, I get those panic attacks sometimes. I just see everything in my house and realize I'm the only one that does a goddamn thing about cleaning/any other responsibilities around the place. I have been working 40 hours a week in an office, and coming home to that and just feeling irritated by any other presence is enough to send me into a downward spiral. On top of that, I'm sick of working full time and not seeing much return. I paid more than my insurance company did on my last dental drilling fiasco.

Andrew said...

reagan dude. i don't mean to be a prick for correcting your spelling or whatever. but i have minor OCD when it comes to that. Is that politically correct? yeah, I think it is. OCD and ADD and all that shit are made-up diseases anyway.

and you're mostly right about the dark knight. Ledger owned everybody but I was pretty disappointed by the two-face character. I still think the movie kicked ass though, because I don't judge movies based on anything other than the ratio of asskicking to suck

J✫sh said...

I agree. The Dark Knight was pretty good. But it definitely wasn't the best that everyone made it out to be. I wish I would have seen it without the hype because I was bummed that it wasn't that awesome.
Burritos are my favorite food ever. If I had to eat something every day for the rest of my life that would be it. They're so versatile. But sometimes I understand you just have to have a quesadilla or something.
Springsteen, man, you know I didn't really get it for a long time. Then one day I picked up Born In The U.S.A. from a salvation army just because I was in the mood to hear "Dancing In The Dark" for some reason. But while listening to the record I heard "I'm Goin' Down" and I've been a fan ever since. Nebraska's so fucking epic. Bruce is my #2 favorite solo artist of all time only surpassed by Mr. Johnny Cash.

And to the guy about Skiba being in the Dark Knight. Where? I've never heard of this until now.

bloodiedup3o said...

The scene where everyone is trying to kill that one guy whose being escorted in the truck or else the hospital is gonna blow up. There's a crowd of people they show though glass doors and Skiba is the tallest one in the crowd wearing a suit and screaming.

nancy said...

The BSC is a great place to come when in doubt of what's good in life. One time I ventured away from the burrito and I got something crusty and bally and it tasted like Play-Doh. I have not ventured away since.

Keri said...

An old friend of mine described Bruce Springsteen as Bob Dylan for jocks. Do with that what you will.

Burritos. They're pretty good. They dominate not just mexcian food but every food ever in San Francisco. Interestingly enough, they're not even a legit mexican food. Burrito means little donkey in spanish. I asked an hispanic coworker of mine something about burritos once and she said "donkey?" But a grilled chicken burrito leftover is good for days.

And fuck Ronald Reagan. If he was such a great president why are the homeless flooding the streets of SF? Yeah. You already know this but just a rhetorical question.

Jorubo said...

Here is a link to an interview with Alkaline Trio where they do (briefly) talk about Matt being in The Dark Knight.

http://www.absolutepunk.net/showthread.php?t=370141

Burritos are money at around 2am after a few too many.

John Barrett said...

While we're talking facts, Springsteen is Catholic.

John Barrett said...

also, bad assedness is, I believe, the correct term.

Billy Joel is Bruce's ball sweat given a solid form.

martin* said...

Yet another great read. You have inspired me to start my own blog full of random thoughts and rants. Please check it out if you get a chance.

Also the next time TLA or The Falcon tour bring that shit to New Zealand

artielovescupcakes said...

Cube was way better then Ren but dude have you listen to Cube lately he blows. Man death certificate was his last good album. AMW was by far his best. Quite frankly Black Moon and Smif n Wessun kill NWA hands down.....

Joel Kreuzer said...

best cure for a hang over?

Zac Markey said...

born to run is awesome.

the river on the other hand is pretty corny and bad.

born in the usa has "i'm on fire" so it's automatically sort of good.

do you think tom petty is overrated as well?

Jesse said...

Aw dude, you had to bring Springsteen into this.

Look, the guy did some pretty awesome stuff in a time that was pretty stagnant. Take a listen to The Wild The Innocent and the E Street Shuffle. Read the lyrics to Born to Run. The guy knew how to write a song. And he did it with a lot of energy, honesty, and a stiff political bent that popular music hadn't really seen.

Forget his post '78 material and focus on the early stuff. Then go listen to The Ghost of Tom Joad and Nebraska. The dude knew how to write a short story in song form. Extremely literary.

I do have to say, though, that I'm biased. The guy is hip to his shit though. He listens to tons of punk and indie stuff. Also, Italian and Irish. Not Jewish. Sorry.

Forget Hungry Heart and listen to Candy's Room. Let Because the Night go and embrace I'm On Fire. Trade one 10th Avenue Freeze Out for one Meeting Across the River.

From,

A Punknews editor who doesn't even listen to your band.

Moxie. said...

lol at dropping punknews for street cred