Man, Dan and I went to the cubs game last night and I ate a huge steaming pile of garbage. The farts that gently pepper the air around me are testament to the rottenness that infects one’s insides if you pour oldstyle and whiskey all over nachos and hotdogs. It was a pretty good time. I got a little loose and today I’m feeling a bit groggy. Not hungover, mind you, but groggy. Nothing a bike ride won’t fix.
I lost my favorite hat last night too. It’s just a regular knit beanie, but man, I’ve had that motherfucker since I was in highschool. I’m wearing it on the back of our Cocktails and Dreams record in the picture where Neil is entertaining Chris and I with the marionette in Greece. That hat was great and now it’s out there, lonely and scared getting worn by god knows who. It’s fucking troubling, fer reals.
Okay, so on to business. I’m sure you’re wondering about my movie. Let’s just say that on Sunday, I said ‘pig dick’ in front of a restaurant full of elderly people about six billion times and I watched a guy beat another guy with a gallon of milk. It was hilarious. From now on, the shooting’s gonna be mostly just on weekends, which means I may be a little more regular with this wonderfully witty little project that you all constantly hit refresh for all day long…Which brings me to my next point:
The voting for our ten year anniversary show is now underway. Here’s how the shit works. Send an email to firstname.lastname@example.org and vote for the song or songs you want to hear at the show at the metro on Oct. 24. This will probably end up informing our setlists out west too, so feel free to vote for any of the shows. Now, keep in mind a few things. Firstly, you can vote for as many songs as you want, but if you’re really irritating, or you send in a whole setlist, or you’re demanding or you sound in any way like a dildo, I’m not counting your vote. Yeah, boo hoo. Anyway, secondly, there are NO songs that are safe, meaning only the songs you vote for will be played, so don’t vote for obscure shit thinking that someone else is gonna do all the voting for 100 resolutions. If you don’t vote for it, it’s not getting played, understand? You gotta vote for the songs you actually want to hear. Don’t try to impress me by pulling out something obscure if it’s not legitimately a song you want to hear, because frankly, it’s not impressive, it’s just kind of dumb and counterproductive.
Third, if you all vote and the winning setlist just absolutely sucks, we’re not gonna play it, so no being a smartass and attempting to sabotage a show you won’t be at or any shit like that, got it? This is the kind of thing that really shouldn’t have to be said, but everyone’s a fucking comedian now days, and there’s nothing like laying down a little contest with a few rules to bring the assholes out of the woodwork to try to ‘beat the system’ or ‘culture jam’ or whatever dumb phrase you’re using these days as a euphemism for ‘being a dork.’
Uh, what else? Oh, okay, we’re gonna try to do a nice selection from all our records, which means that even if the top fifteen songs are all off one record, we’re only probably gonna play five of em, and then the tabulation will start again with the most voted for songs on the other records. This is mostly for 2 reasons. 1) I don’t want to play Ghost Stories front to back, and 2) it’s a fucking anniversary celebration type thing…it should have a retrospective vibe, don’tcha think?
Oh! And since it’s gonna be leaked all over the internet by then, don’t forget about our five new songs. You can vote for those too.
Uh, I think that’s everything. I fucking hate all of you.